[ he frowns deeply to that. how can anybody even make rational decisions when they're that young? he doesn't need guesses, but he wonders if it's appropriate to ask.
he does anyway. ]
How many times did you try? [ how many times did you fight against your own body to try and regain some autonomy? ]
[that was all that it took, to know it was futile.]
I didn't... do it myself. [he didn't have the will for that.] But it would act on its own. React to my own stress, or strong emotions. It turned on a person, once.
[he recalls it clearly. her terror, with the blade of his arm at her throat. pulling against it with all his might while it refused to budge.]
Security-- I yelled at them to cut it, and they finally did. But after that...
...that's pretty horrifying. [ he has at least never had that kind of traumatic side effects. his are more a slow-dawning horror of everything in the world changing around him but he never will. ] How...so it's another one of those things where you really have to stay calm in order to control it. Or did it get better and more adjusted after that?
no subject
he does anyway. ]
How many times did you try? [ how many times did you fight against your own body to try and regain some autonomy? ]
no subject
[that was all that it took, to know it was futile.]
I didn't... do it myself. [he didn't have the will for that.] But it would act on its own. React to my own stress, or strong emotions. It turned on a person, once.
[he recalls it clearly. her terror, with the blade of his arm at her throat. pulling against it with all his might while it refused to budge.]
Security-- I yelled at them to cut it, and they finally did. But after that...
Just turned on them instead.
no subject
...that's pretty horrifying. [ he has at least never had that kind of traumatic side effects. his are more a slow-dawning horror of everything in the world changing around him but he never will. ] How...so it's another one of those things where you really have to stay calm in order to control it. Or did it get better and more adjusted after that?